This transcript features a conversation between Vicky and interviewers Megan and Jason van Genderen from 'Everybody's Oma'. Nynelle shares her family's proactive aged care journey and the thoughtful steps they took to support her parents' transition into residential care. Married for more than 60 years, Nel's parents faced increasing care needs, including dementia, falls and challenges living independently at home.

Introduction

00:01 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
Hey, Lynelle

00:02 | Lynelle:
Hi.

00:03 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
How are you? I'm Jason and this is Megan.

00:05 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
Hi.

00:05 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
These are for you.

00:07 | Lynelle:
Oh, thank you.

00:08 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
We’ve brought some cake as well.

00:11 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
Wow, what a gorgeous spot.
 

Meet mum and dad

00:15 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
Lynelle, thank you so much for having us in your home. Could you tell us a bit about your mum and dad? What are your parents like?

00:23 | Lynelle:
Mum and Dad have been married for 60 years. They both grew up in Newcastle. Dad was a journalist and worked at NBN for 30 years, and Mum was a kindergarten teacher. We always joke that she never progressed past kindergarten because she loved teaching young children so much. 

They've been heavily involved in the Church throughout their lives, and family has always been their number one priority. Family, faith and their work really define who Mum and Dad are. 
 

Why They chose residential aged care

00:56 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
How did your parents become part of the Rutherford Park Care Community?

01:00 | Lynelle:
During COVID, they were both struggling a little. They were managing together, but when we visited their GP for an annual check-up, she felt it was time to move from home care into permanent residential aged care.

Dad has dementia, and Mum tends to worry about everything. We could see that they needed more support than they were receiving at home. 
 

Recognising the signs it was time for more support

01:28 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
What was happening at home that suggested they needed full-time care?

01:33 | Lynelle:
I started noticing little warning signs. There were food items in the fridge that had gone off. Whenever I visited, there was always a growing list of jobs that needed doing. That wasn't normal.

Mum had started having falls, and Dad was becoming more withdrawn. They were also relying heavily on their wonderful neighbours. I felt that wasn't fair on the neighbours, and it wasn't fair on Mum and Dad either.

02:07 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
Did your GP help facilitate those conversations?

02:08 | Lynelle:
Absolutely. She was amazing. 
 

The benefits of planning ahead for aged care

02:11 | Lynelle:
One of our friends had recently helped her parents move into aged care and gave me some valuable advice. She said, "Start early so they can settle in properly." 

By planning ahead, they could move in together and choose where they wanted to live, rather than making rushed decisions during a health crisis when only limited options might be available. 

02:32 | Lynelle:
Mum was very clear about one thing: if they moved, they were moving together. 

02:39 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
That's an interesting approach because many families don't start looking until they're already in crisis. Taking a proactive approach gives everyone more choice and time to prepare. 

02:54 | Lynelle:
We actually started talking about it around 12 months earlier. Mum always said she wasn't going into a "nursing home" or an "old people's home". Those were the terms she used. 

Their GP, who had known them for more than 30 years, explained that modern aged care communities are very different. She told Mum they're more like homes now. They're places where people live, receive care and stay connected. That really helped change Mum's perspective. 
 

First Impressions of Rutherford Park Care Community

03:25 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
What surprised you when you first toured Rutherford Park?

03:30 | Lynelle:
The staff immediately stood out. Everyone was warm and welcoming from the moment I arrived. 

03:35 | Lynelle:
There were comfortable lounge-style chairs, a lovely café and inviting communal spaces. I immediately thought how wonderful it would be for Mum and Dad to have visitors there. 

Then I sat down with Tracy, who carefully explained everything to me. The rooms, the facilities and the support available all felt welcoming and homely. 
 

Personalised Care as Needs Change

03:56 | Jason van Genderen (Interviewer):
How has the team responded as your parents' care needs have changed? 

04:00 | Lynelle:
Brilliantly. Absolutely brilliantly. They always keep me informed and involve me in decisions. They'll call me and explain what they're recommending and ask whether I'm comfortable with the plan. 

Mum has always liked to stay busy and contribute. The team recognised that and found ways to involve her in activities. 

For example, at Christmas they invited Mum to help fold serviettes and set tables. Those little things help her feel valued, included and important. 
 

The Difference Compassionate Care Makes

04:31 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
Do you notice the impact those small actions have on your parents? 

04:38 | Lynelle:
Definitely. Dad especially notices it. Even though he has dementia, he's always been someone who quietly observes everything around him. 

He often says, "I love this. It's so nice. I'm so glad we've moved here." 
 

Closing Thoughts

04:57 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's a journey many families will relate to, especially the idea of starting conversations early and taking a proactive approach to aged care planning. 

05:11 | Lynelle:
Yes. Be kind, but be proactive. Plant the seed early and give people time to adjust to the idea. 

05:18 | Megan van Genderen (Interviewer):
It sounds like you approached it in a respectful way that honoured your parents' wishes, and it has really paid off.

05:23 | Lynelle:
We've been very lucky. Very lucky